One of the emotions that White helpers-in-training can deal with is shame (Parker & Schwartz, 2002). Shame arises as they recognize the misdeeds of their ancestors and the amount of privilege they have enjoyed. Shame and feelings of helplessness to change the situation can lead to defensive reactions. For example, we ignore the homeless person on the street so that we do not have to face the guilt of not helping. When you experience these feelings of shame or helplessness in working with clients, how do you plan to deal with them? Could they make you defensive and create a barrier between you and a client? Could you compensate by being overly helpful? What kind of training or support will you need?
1. Reflect on a time when you think that you really helped someone. What did you do and say that seemed to have been especially helpful? Contrast this, if you can, with another time when you tried to help but you were not as successful. What was different about the two situations?
2. Recall a relationship, past or present, where the other person was significantly different from you, either in age, culture, or ethnicity. Discuss the experience. Was the development of the relationship more challenging than with someone more similar to you? In what ways? How did you your differences enhance or deter the relationship? How did you overcome any obstacles to communication? What did you learn from the experience?
Recent Comments